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MindChanger NewsLetter
October 2, 2005
Welcome to the MindChanger NewsLetter.
Are you as fascinated with the human mind as I am? Well, who isn’t, when you get down to it? Who do you
wonder about more? Yourself, or other people?
That’s a tough call, isn’t it? Most of us are pretty hard on ourselves, so we sort of expect our SELF to mess
up fairly predictably. (NOT GOOD! See The First Law of Psychology below) On the other hand, we can get
taken completely by surprise by some of the stuff that comes out of people we thought we knew.
That, by the way, is the biggest cause of low self-esteem. As a cause, it is many laps out in front of any
other cause.
Huh, you ask? What is she talking about? WHAT cause? I don’t see anything that looks like a cause.
You. You’re the cause. The way you treat yourself. That’s THE single biggest cause of low self esteem,
excluding none. And, that’s my favorite soap box, so you’ll read a lot about it.
But, I’ll get back to that in a couple minutes.
There are some great things happening in the world of mind studies that are revealing interesting facts
about the way we think and make decisions and even how we think we are making decisions but we aren't
deciding anything at all. We are actually just reverting to HABIT.
Like with the self-filling soup bowl:
Think you know when you had enough to eat? Well, if you are like most people, you haven’t got a clue.
Your mother was right when she said your eyes can be bigger than your stomach.
In a recent study, participants ate soup from either regular bowls or, unbeknownst to them, self-refilling bowls. People who ate
from the self-refilling bowls consumed about 73 percent more than the people who ate from regular bowls, but they didn't feel
fuller. Bottom line: don't let your eyes decide when you've had enough. Use measuring cups and scales to help you avoid
overeating.
Evidence from several studies suggests your body may use visual cues to determine how full you feel. This means you may not
begin to feel sated until your plate is clean, no matter how large the plate is. Avoid overeating in part by using smaller dishware
and by measuring your servings with cup measures or scales. Never eat directly from the box, serving dish, jar, carton, or
can. –from a CNN news article
Does that give you a rather disconcerting clue as to how those extra pounds might have sneaked under
your belt?
…which is a good time to toss in a commercial for my new weight management CD set...
The Weigh-Out Tool Kit
A tremendous amount of research went into these five interactive CDs, and they come with complete
Instructions and success tips. The background sounds are designed to synchronize and slow brain waves to
optimize the hypnosis experience. Check out the details at www.changebyhypnosis.com.
…Which brings me back to the SELF ESTEEM issue…
The biggest reason why people fail at weight management and ANY self-improvement issue is because they
have convinced themselves they are too hopeless to succeed.
And hypnosis can only do so much.
When you spend 80% of your day telling yourself that you are “unworthy” in some way or another, you
override the most powerful suggestions. They work for awhile, and then, well, they get eroded away by the
constant flood of “I-don’t-deserve-twenty-minutes-a-day-to-reinforce-my-sessions-and-I-look-too-awful-to-
exercise-I’ll-just-eat-a-donut-to-feel-better-now-I-proved-I’m-hopeless,” litanies.
What can you do about it? Well, first, you have to convince yourself you are worth changing.
Actually, I’m about half serious.
And, I feel so strongly about this that I will soon be coming out with a workbook and a set of CD’s to
address this issue. In addition, I will be posting some articles to www.changebyhypnosis.com.
But, for now, you are getting a technique worth hundreds of dollars, here and now. Try it. It works. Pass it
on to every friend you know who needs a boost.
REAL PERSON CASE HISTORY
The following is an excerpt from session with a very intelligent, educated person (name and details
changed, of course) who was developing a serious case of “social anxiety” (not wanting to leave the house
and interact with the world) because, although he spent many years and dollars” improving” himself, he
was actually convincing himself, with every “improvement” that he was basically inadequate. I’m very happy
to report that he is making excellent progress, now.
“Casey, self-esteem issues originate from the way others treated us when we were children, but they are perpetuated by US. We
can choose to change them. How quickly that happens is very individual, and depends on acceptance by the subconscious mind.
“Since the subconscious is quite child-like, it helps to work with your sc as you would deal with a child, and always use the utmost
respect.
“The very first thing you need to do is realize that you are not playing fair with yourself. You are comparing your "insides"
(with all the doubts, anxieties, and perceived imperfections) against "their" outsides (public/professional facades). About like
comparing puppies with golf courses, isn't it?
“So what would you do if you realized that not playing fair with yourself was REALLY the source of your self-esteem
problems? What if you attacked that issue with the same determination you used to vanquish the athletic-bettercar-moremoney-
socialskills issues?
“Or, what if you did a "fair" and honest outsides-to-outsides comparison (Act as if you had a friend with poor self-esteem who
asked you for an honest evaluation.)? And, maybe if you paid closer attention, you might notice how others' "insides" tend to
leak out all the time and they are a lot like yours.
“These are serious questions, and we usually dance around and away from them because it makes things change inside us when
we answer them, and that makes us feel like an acrobat letting loose of one swing in order to (maybe) catch another. Perhaps
you would like to just think about the above while you do the following...
‘Get a small spiral notebook that you can put into a pocket or purse. At the top of the first page, write today's date. Below that
write all the good things you did or thought today. You need to come up with at least one for each hour you were breathing.
Repetitions are acceptable, wonderful, even. Means you are consistent.
“There are two rules: 1. List only good things. (2)IF YOU WOULD BEAT YOURSELF UP FOR NOT DOING "SOMETHING",
YOU MUST GIVE YOUSELF CREDIT FOR EVERYTIME YOU DO IT, AND VICE VERSA.
‘For example, if you might say "I'm such a slug. I didn't even take a shower, Saturday. I just laid around, ate junk and watched
the tube. I should have...", you must give yourself credit for every time you took a shower, ate a proper meal, and did
something besides watch the tube. Every single day that you do what you chastised yourself for not doing, you have to list it.
Every day for the rest of the notebook - unless, of course, you spend another Saturday.... Then you have to give yourself credit
for the fact that six out of seven days...
If you would beat yourself up for eating a donut, you have to list every time you didn't.
You will, of course, also list any and all other things you do and think that meet YOUR definition of "good"- as you define it for
those mythical "others" to whom you are comparing yourself.
This exercise teaches you to be fair with yourself. Writing it all down, day after day, for at least 30 days, is essential. Your
subconscious keeps score of what YOU think about yourself. The first law of psychology is what you pay attention to, you get
more of.
This exercise is very powerful. Just try it. Then go back to the other questions and see if you answer them the same way.
…and that brings us back to The First Law of Psychology…
which is “what you pay attention to, you get more of.” And, the more intense the emotion behind your
attention, the more your subconscious is convinced that THIS IS IMPORTANT! It is totally incidental whether
your emotion is positive or negative. What your subconscious pays attention to is how much you care.
Your assignment, should you accept it, is to apply that concept the things that matter most in your life and
notice what you might be saying to yourself. Do you, for example, have job or relationship problems? What
are you focusing on about them? Do you have weight or spending issues? What are you telling yourself?
I hope very much that you will take time to pay attention to anything that is going well and focus all your
gratitude and pleasure on that!
And, now, if you have found this MindChanger useful, please share it with any friends, family, coworkers, or
associates you think may find it interesting. You are welcome to reprint it or copy it as long as you include
the copyright and subscription information. I’m always interested in your comments, questions, and
feedback. Please send them to leemengel@changebyhypnosis.com.
bE CAREFUL WHAT YOU SAY TO YOURSELF...YOU'RE LISTENING!
lee Mengel
How to Subscribe: If someone shared this MindChanger with you and you would like to subscribe,
please go to www.changebyhypnosis.com or send an email to admin@changebyhypnosis.com.
October 2, 2005
Welcome to the MindChanger NewsLetter.
Are you as fascinated with the human mind as I am? Well, who isn’t, when you get down to it? Who do you
wonder about more? Yourself, or other people?
That’s a tough call, isn’t it? Most of us are pretty hard on ourselves, so we sort of expect our SELF to mess
up fairly predictably. (NOT GOOD! See The First Law of Psychology below) On the other hand, we can get
taken completely by surprise by some of the stuff that comes out of people we thought we knew.
That, by the way, is the biggest cause of low self-esteem. As a cause, it is many laps out in front of any
other cause.
Huh, you ask? What is she talking about? WHAT cause? I don’t see anything that looks like a cause.
You. You’re the cause. The way you treat yourself. That’s THE single biggest cause of low self esteem,
excluding none. And, that’s my favorite soap box, so you’ll read a lot about it.
But, I’ll get back to that in a couple minutes.
There are some great things happening in the world of mind studies that are revealing interesting facts
about the way we think and make decisions and even how we think we are making decisions but we aren't
deciding anything at all. We are actually just reverting to HABIT.
Like with the self-filling soup bowl:
Think you know when you had enough to eat? Well, if you are like most people, you haven’t got a clue.
Your mother was right when she said your eyes can be bigger than your stomach.
In a recent study, participants ate soup from either regular bowls or, unbeknownst to them, self-refilling bowls. People who ate
from the self-refilling bowls consumed about 73 percent more than the people who ate from regular bowls, but they didn't feel
fuller. Bottom line: don't let your eyes decide when you've had enough. Use measuring cups and scales to help you avoid
overeating.
Evidence from several studies suggests your body may use visual cues to determine how full you feel. This means you may not
begin to feel sated until your plate is clean, no matter how large the plate is. Avoid overeating in part by using smaller dishware
and by measuring your servings with cup measures or scales. Never eat directly from the box, serving dish, jar, carton, or
can. –from a CNN news article
Does that give you a rather disconcerting clue as to how those extra pounds might have sneaked under
your belt?
…which is a good time to toss in a commercial for my new weight management CD set...
The Weigh-Out Tool Kit
A tremendous amount of research went into these five interactive CDs, and they come with complete
Instructions and success tips. The background sounds are designed to synchronize and slow brain waves to
optimize the hypnosis experience. Check out the details at www.changebyhypnosis.com.
…Which brings me back to the SELF ESTEEM issue…
The biggest reason why people fail at weight management and ANY self-improvement issue is because they
have convinced themselves they are too hopeless to succeed.
And hypnosis can only do so much.
When you spend 80% of your day telling yourself that you are “unworthy” in some way or another, you
override the most powerful suggestions. They work for awhile, and then, well, they get eroded away by the
constant flood of “I-don’t-deserve-twenty-minutes-a-day-to-reinforce-my-sessions-and-I-look-too-awful-to-
exercise-I’ll-just-eat-a-donut-to-feel-better-now-I-proved-I’m-hopeless,” litanies.
What can you do about it? Well, first, you have to convince yourself you are worth changing.
Actually, I’m about half serious.
And, I feel so strongly about this that I will soon be coming out with a workbook and a set of CD’s to
address this issue. In addition, I will be posting some articles to www.changebyhypnosis.com.
But, for now, you are getting a technique worth hundreds of dollars, here and now. Try it. It works. Pass it
on to every friend you know who needs a boost.
REAL PERSON CASE HISTORY
The following is an excerpt from session with a very intelligent, educated person (name and details
changed, of course) who was developing a serious case of “social anxiety” (not wanting to leave the house
and interact with the world) because, although he spent many years and dollars” improving” himself, he
was actually convincing himself, with every “improvement” that he was basically inadequate. I’m very happy
to report that he is making excellent progress, now.
“Casey, self-esteem issues originate from the way others treated us when we were children, but they are perpetuated by US. We
can choose to change them. How quickly that happens is very individual, and depends on acceptance by the subconscious mind.
“Since the subconscious is quite child-like, it helps to work with your sc as you would deal with a child, and always use the utmost
respect.
“The very first thing you need to do is realize that you are not playing fair with yourself. You are comparing your "insides"
(with all the doubts, anxieties, and perceived imperfections) against "their" outsides (public/professional facades). About like
comparing puppies with golf courses, isn't it?
“So what would you do if you realized that not playing fair with yourself was REALLY the source of your self-esteem
problems? What if you attacked that issue with the same determination you used to vanquish the athletic-bettercar-moremoney-
socialskills issues?
“Or, what if you did a "fair" and honest outsides-to-outsides comparison (Act as if you had a friend with poor self-esteem who
asked you for an honest evaluation.)? And, maybe if you paid closer attention, you might notice how others' "insides" tend to
leak out all the time and they are a lot like yours.
“These are serious questions, and we usually dance around and away from them because it makes things change inside us when
we answer them, and that makes us feel like an acrobat letting loose of one swing in order to (maybe) catch another. Perhaps
you would like to just think about the above while you do the following...
‘Get a small spiral notebook that you can put into a pocket or purse. At the top of the first page, write today's date. Below that
write all the good things you did or thought today. You need to come up with at least one for each hour you were breathing.
Repetitions are acceptable, wonderful, even. Means you are consistent.
“There are two rules: 1. List only good things. (2)IF YOU WOULD BEAT YOURSELF UP FOR NOT DOING "SOMETHING",
YOU MUST GIVE YOUSELF CREDIT FOR EVERYTIME YOU DO IT, AND VICE VERSA.
‘For example, if you might say "I'm such a slug. I didn't even take a shower, Saturday. I just laid around, ate junk and watched
the tube. I should have...", you must give yourself credit for every time you took a shower, ate a proper meal, and did
something besides watch the tube. Every single day that you do what you chastised yourself for not doing, you have to list it.
Every day for the rest of the notebook - unless, of course, you spend another Saturday.... Then you have to give yourself credit
for the fact that six out of seven days...
If you would beat yourself up for eating a donut, you have to list every time you didn't.
You will, of course, also list any and all other things you do and think that meet YOUR definition of "good"- as you define it for
those mythical "others" to whom you are comparing yourself.
This exercise teaches you to be fair with yourself. Writing it all down, day after day, for at least 30 days, is essential. Your
subconscious keeps score of what YOU think about yourself. The first law of psychology is what you pay attention to, you get
more of.
This exercise is very powerful. Just try it. Then go back to the other questions and see if you answer them the same way.
…and that brings us back to The First Law of Psychology…
which is “what you pay attention to, you get more of.” And, the more intense the emotion behind your
attention, the more your subconscious is convinced that THIS IS IMPORTANT! It is totally incidental whether
your emotion is positive or negative. What your subconscious pays attention to is how much you care.
Your assignment, should you accept it, is to apply that concept the things that matter most in your life and
notice what you might be saying to yourself. Do you, for example, have job or relationship problems? What
are you focusing on about them? Do you have weight or spending issues? What are you telling yourself?
I hope very much that you will take time to pay attention to anything that is going well and focus all your
gratitude and pleasure on that!
And, now, if you have found this MindChanger useful, please share it with any friends, family, coworkers, or
associates you think may find it interesting. You are welcome to reprint it or copy it as long as you include
the copyright and subscription information. I’m always interested in your comments, questions, and
feedback. Please send them to leemengel@changebyhypnosis.com.
bE CAREFUL WHAT YOU SAY TO YOURSELF...YOU'RE LISTENING!
lee Mengel
How to Subscribe: If someone shared this MindChanger with you and you would like to subscribe,
please go to www.changebyhypnosis.com or send an email to admin@changebyhypnosis.com.
| October, 2005 |